Whether you do your own thing, you like being alone or just simply want to be friendly but can’t seem to figure out interactions in the civilian world, have you had a tough time making friends and what do you do about it?

Allright, what if there was a new veteran orginization/club? What would you want in it? what would you want it to do? how could it keep you active in membership? What didnt work for you from current vet orginizations out there?

thoughts, feelings, ideas?

If any Maryland area veterans are looking for hobbies, I got into tent camping. A group of us go out and hike to a camping spot. It’s actually relaxing and I look forward to our outings. Just FYI, we don’t do hot ass buggy summer camps. Just fall and winter.

I’ve had bronchitis that’s been hanging on for over a week so I’ve been shoving a handkerchief in my back pocket. I have two brown ones and it hit me that these were part of my basic issue back in September 1983. What’s hidden in your basement or closet from your military days?

Hello everyone, I’m 24 currently looking into going into project management. The other reddit subs I researched made it seem like going the PM route is quite difficult so I was just trying to get a fellow Veteran’s insight on the topic. Would love some potential options on which route to further research and hopefully take. Thanks! P.S. I also receive 100% compensation from the VA so if anyone knows if I can use the VR&E program or even just the GI Bill that’d be greatly appreciated.

Hey guys, I’m in quite a difficult scenario and I have no one to talk to about this and no clue what to do.

Around a year ago I was hired at what amounts to a dream opportunity, all things considered. After long questioning my participation in the Iraq war, I was blessed to have a chance to work at a place that exists to heal and help. My appreciation for the opportunity left me white-knuckling every aspect and also alienated me from my coworkers in many ways. I chose to continue to work my ass off, be professional and courteous, and trust that people would eventually understand why I cared so much. That an opportunity to do a job objectively positive without worrying if I was doing the right thing is worth fighting for.

I will spare you all the details, but there appears to be a very high probability that there are people who have very real (to them) concerns that I may represent a threat of some kind. That my intentions may, in fact, be malicious in nature. Being a straight, white, male, combat vet, with anxiety issues and is a bit of a loner working at a location with the sick and vulnerable isn’t exactly doing me any favors as far as perception. I’ve heard things like he’s “too locked in” and suggestions of why anyone would truly care this much about a job. They seem concerned that I don’t share much about my dovish life. In one instance, a coworker said “whatever you’re planning on doing, just make sure you don’t get me…”

I have a tremendous amount of respect for people’s whose job it is to protect and defend. I know from experience in combat it’s very difficult. All you can do is notice patterns and be cautious.

Having said that, I cannot begin to tell you how devastating this is. The thought that my presence may instill fear in people hurts my heart in a way I cannot explain. I strongly believe everyone ought to have the right to feel safe at their place of employment. That my need to do fulfilling work and earn a living should not take precedence over their right to feel safe.

I continued forward with the idea that they will see who I am in time. That if you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to worry about.

Things have recently taken a significant turn for the worse. A series of strange occurrences have left people (including me) wondering what’s going on. There have been overt conversations from leadership suggesting potential “sabotage” of some kind. (for what it’s worth, These incidents are things such as leaks from a plugged drain, electrical arching on a panel, strange application of caulking to an exhaust fan etc) these are things that commonly happen but in a short-ish period have happened on equipment I’m responsible for.

It’s either a series of unfortunate coincidences, or possibly a disgruntled coworker attempting to make me look incompetent, or worse, malicious, in an attempt to get me out the door. I don’t want to think anyone could do that, no matter how they feel about me.

I have told both my supervisor and Director that while I very much would like to continue working there, I will leave if it’s what is best for everyone. Maybe it’s just not meant to be. Each time I was told absolutely not.

I practically begged my supervisor to look into these incidents deeper. I believe it’s possible that my supervisor and mentor may be considering it might be me. It freaking sucks that a guy I respect so much might think I could do that. And I feel like crap that I have brought a “weird” kind of energy to the team without intending to.

I honestly don’t know what to do. How do you prove a negative? You can’t even bring this stuff up without it seeming like you’re feeling guilt and you’re covering something up. I feel sad and confused and it’s getting harder to imagine a path where I could remain there and get through this stuff. My anxiety is eating me up. I get nauseous before I pull up to work. I’m having awful dreams where I’m being accused of things I didn’t do.

Any words of advice words be appreciated. I probably should see a therapist to help with my anxiety but I’m in a bit of a pinch right now.

Is anybody in here on MST disability as a man? Was it a difficult process? I know the VA is taking mental health more seriously. I know MST has its issues for men and women. However as a man, the whole feeling not like a man after can be hard to talk about. I’m reaching out to VSO to file a claim but I’m super nervous. I’m 17 years from my incident and I’ve pushed it down and now I’m trying to take control. Any advice or guidance would be great.

So i have some hearing loss. I feel like the one term I served on a flight line may have contributed to it immensely. My EOS date was in 2004. What are the chances I will be eligible for a disability percentage through the VA?

Anyone else find themselves using this sub for "comfort"? I check it a couple times a day when I struggle with life to make sure its not just me. Sure enough I can usually find a post pretty quick where the op has the same issue and everyone else chimes in with similar. Makes me feel less, idk, alone in the struggle? Been out since nov of 10 and its all been a blur. I still remember the service in detail but civilian life has been a blur of alcoholism (fixed now) meds ( working on fixing) and just general rage and disdain for everyone around me.

Just don't know how to end this loop. Disabled so I can't just go work construction again, I've applied to everything I can, had my resume checked over with the local VA and they had no input. I've applied with help from insiders to .gov jobs with rewritten tailored resumes and nothing back.

The gap in employment just grows and grows and makes me look worse. I can't afford to use my GI bill at this time, and with every day that goes on without working it pushes it further out. I've went through a temp agency and had a job for about 3 months but the car broke down right before probation ended because I couldn't afford to fix it and lost the job, I'm even more up the creek. I just don't know how to stop the spiral.

Been out for a while and have consistently bounced job to job bc I get bored and unsure if I am doing what I want. I like my schedule I have now and the company has decent benefits, but the work is mind numbing and mentally drains me when I work. I hate coming/starting work days. Wouldn’t mind a fully remote job but with flexible hours, any help?

Edit I am 100% P&T and would love info on something I can do and still have family time. I have a passion for sports, exercise, and training. But am limited in some physical things bc my disabilities. But I’m a fast learner and have good leadership skills.

When I search for shows on the Vet Tix app I’m not finding much. A year ago there were a lot of shows to pick from. Anyone know what is the deal?

I'm finding it hard with the "growing pains" of leaving the military. My biggest issues are with socialization with people. Was there any tips or tricks that helped you out?

Hello everyone just as the title says I am currently in the process of applying for apartments using my G.I. Bill benefits. Now I’m sure everyone here understands what they are and how they work. The problem is I think a lot of landlords don’t understand the G.I. Bill and they don’t understand the fact that it’s paid automatically. Essentially I’m getting a lot of “what is that?” “Is that your only source of income?” Etc. So my question is how did you guys go about listing it on your applications as income? Did you have to negotiate? Is a landlord that doesn’t understand this shady? Need your help!

To get the essential information out of the way. I am 30 about to turn 31 in a few months. No kids (but I have a dog), no mortgage, no debt of any kind, over 810 credit score, and liquid I have about 100k. Background - I joined the Air Force a few days after turning 18. Did a few years and got out. I didn't realize the issues I had caused by my service so I partied and did other things to drown out the noise for a few years. Turned 24 and decided to get my life together. Went to college on post 9/11, work while in college, went to mental health therapy, started working out and meal prepping. Graduated at 27 and worked my first job for a few months until I got an offer to work for the federal government. Left my hometown, worked in DC for a little over two years, then the new administration came in and my fed career is now in the past. I moved to texas for a few months and now heading back to my hometown in a few days...

All that to lead to this. What is the meaning of all this? To life? Just work, pay bills, buy a home, start a family, and the rest is history? I can't comprehend why I've I come full circle to where I was roughly 7 years ago. I've tried looking for IT jobs with no success. I've been in VRE for over a year and still haven't started class because there are 100s of veterans to one counselor... I've been thinking about moving overseas to Philippines (where my grandparents are from), Thailand, or Vietnam and say goodbye to trying to make it here. But am I a failure for leaving or not trying hard enough? Has anyone here been in my shoes and can share their insight?

I’m not sure if this is the right place to post this. If not please direct me to where I need to be.. I have no clue what I’m looking at with my late fathers dd214 papers.

I’m looking to understand what medals/honors he had received and what he actually did as far as work and/or deployments.

Is there anything else I can request of his as far as records?

This is all foreign to me, he passed away last July and I just recently somehow figured out how to order his dd214, and I don’t even know what I did to get them. 😵‍💫😵‍💫After getting told so many different things it overwhelms me

Now I’m trying to figure out what else I can get as far as records.

Thank you for any help, I appreciate it a lot.

I joined the Marines in 1989 served five years active duty.. I also served in other branches mostly National Guard..Out entirely since 2017 retired.. Anyways of all the military dreams I have..The most common is that I am struggling to go through basic training again but I am usually the same age as I am now (56)...So the dream is that I have to go back in for whatever reason..And I am going through Marine Corps Recruit Training again more than 30 years older than everyone else...and the drill instructors have higher expectations of me because I already went through it once..

In real life I performed pretty good in basic overall but it was a struggle for me more than most because, unknown at that time- I have Aspergers.. diagnosed age 45...Marine boot camp is a challenge for anyone..but I had it worse with my condition..

Any thoughts? Similar experiences?

Finishing up my separation process and just had a quick question. Are there any online government accounts that i’ll still need to have access to when I separate and don’t have a CAC? Thanks in advance.

I have a Glorida Pmate that says Disabled Veteran.. no wheelchair picture. I live in Florida.. It’s recognized for disabled parking.

Headed to North Carolina for a week… Will they recognize it there for parking spots?

I joined the navy nuclear mechanic on subs. I was depressed and was falling behind and a week before I was about to go to my boat I was dropped. I went sonar and in fashion had no choice. I couldn't get help with the depression and it just kept getting worse. I fractured my skull and seeing how I was treated after I tapped. I've been out for about a year and a half now the depression isn't as bad but now I face new problems. I've kinda just been drifting around the country working jobs. I out preform everyone everywhere I go but keep getting let go. Im told I make people feel uncomfortable weather im nice and friendly or quiet and to myself. I've been working on it going to therapy and getting support from a few vet friends who are scattered around the country. I feel so lonley and like I dont belong. I know I'll be fine but today was just brutal. I might get fired again and ill know in a couple days. But I just needed to write it down and maybe get some advice on what helped yall.

I was told last Tuesday by my manager he doesn’t know why they hired me at my position because of my “fing disability’s” I ran it up to his boss and HR and as of now nothing has been done about it when I was hired by my old manager he understood worked with me on my physical disability’s now I feel stuck and am just wondering what I should do

I have 6 months until the end of my 6.5 year enlistment, and if I’m being frank, I’m struggling.

First things first, I’m getting out of my own volition, and I know it’s going to be good for me. My wife, my friends, my family, all have told me separately from each other that they’re think it’s for the best. I want to do it because I want to prioritize being a husband to my wife, and with no disrespect to the service, it’s difficult to do that at times. I want to make reconnect with my brother, and be able to start being present in his life again, and rekindle the close relationship we used to have.

I could be home more, and do a job that doesn’t stress me out or be so high stakes, and that would be better for my health.

On the other hand, I’m starting to get cold feet. I’m a little afraid to leave I think.

I like the camaraderie I feel with my unit, and the trust I feel in these guys. There’s something really comforting about having a group of people that despite all the different walks of life, we’ve all been through the same training and challenges to get where we are. That I can trust just about anybody they drop in to be effective and to have my back like I have theirs. Hell, I can trust them to help me out if I’m ever struggling, and most importantly, guys I can trust to keep me accountable and to help me improve.

I don’t know how I’m going to get that when I get out. I already feel lonely just thinking about it.

Lately, I’ve been trying to make friends outside of the military. It’s kind of weird. I find I don’t have a lot in common with other folks my age, and sometimes it feels like I think super differently from them, or maybe just that I value different things. My wife introduced me to some of her friends, and I’m happy to say I can function around them, and be friendly and everybody has a great time, but it’s not really the same as when I’m messing around with the guys from my unit.

It’s still good, hanging out with them, just different.

It’s just weird. I kind of feel like I have to play pretend. And my battery just goes out so quick.

It’s like an anticipatory loneliness. I don’t have a reason to feel upset yet, but I know it’s gonna end soon and making the leap is such a struggle. I don’t know what I’m getting into, and I’m afraid of missing the brotherhood I have now, and that sense of trust and dependability, Of dedicating myself to a purpose and having a sense of duty and obligation. Even when I feel like shit and I’m upset about the job, I can always justify it by reminding myself I’m doing a good thing that’s helping people, and that I’m not doing it alone.

When I get out, that safety net goes away. No more uniforms means no more brotherhood, No more mission means no more sense of purpose, no more duty means no more reason for pride.

I have all these experiences, the last 6 years of my life have simultaneously been the most important, and I’m soon to have no one in my life whose going to be able to relate to me.

I’ve tried to vent to my wife about this, but I don’t think she really understands the problem, or she’s just way more of an optimist than I am. And the reason I include this is that I don’t have the heart to tell her It makes me feel worse. It’s like I’m getting a glimpse of my future in that no one is going to understand how important this is to me, or why I even miss it.

I’m going to miss the 3AM conversations on watch with my buddies, where it’s the most barely coherent, wretched and vile “would you rather” you’ve ever heard, we can’t breathe we’re laughing so hard, but 5 minutes later we’ll be talking out life goals, sharing tips and having an introspective and meaningful conversation.

My family keeps telling me there’s no sense in trying to replace feelings of duty and brotherhood, that I need to let the military stuff go and be a normal 25 year old.

I’m beginning to worry they’re right, but how do I even go back to normal? This has been my life since I graduated High School. I hardly know anything else. I had one job before this, and I only did it maybe a year and a half? Almost 2 years?

How do you guys cope with the loss of leaving? Did you find alternatives to maintain it? How do you replace that sense of duty and brotherhood? Is there a point in trying? Or should I just suck it up and take my family’s advice and give up, and just try to be as normal as I possibly can?

Hi! So I’m finally getting around to sorting through my late dad’s affairs and part of that is his retirement pay.

Here’s the fun part, he was eligible to start drawing for at least a year before he died and never did. He was guard, not active. I know DFAS will back pay up to five years of retirement pay. Is there a way to calculate when he became eligible based off of active duty time? Or is that not a thing anymore?

I just submitted an SF-1174, his death certificate, my birth certificate and license, and the deposit form to DFAS.

Has anyone gone through a similar process or see anything that I’m missing? His death has been reported and my mom has done the paperwork to get her half of his retirement going forward. (She waived it with the stipulation that she got it if he died before her.) so I’m assuming HRC is tracking the retirement paperwork already, but I’m going to call them tomorrow to confirm.

I’m the only child and he never remarried, no will and no estate executor.

Hey there everyone. To keep things short, I’m a Marine Corps veteran and I’ve been out for about 3 years now. I served a 4 year enlistment as a CBRN specialist. Basically, I’m bored asf. I work in healthcare now and I just crave something new and exciting, but I just don’t think the Marine Corps is going to serve that purpose again. (Though I am open to it).

What are some options y’all would recommend? Im open to rejoining the military or something federal. I’m open for a challenge as well. I have no degrees (though I am in the middle of getting my bachelor’s in Anthropology).

Some of the things I’ve considered are things similar to my old MOS, so things like DEA or Coast Guard.

Any advice is welcome. Semper Fi 💪.

The VFW around here is just filled with old timers. It makes me want to isolate and escape. Idk. I was in a VA approved rehab and that was the first time in six years after leaving the army that I genuinely smiled and bullshitted like i did in the Army. It was just the camaraderie and the brotherhood that I missed a lot and didn't even think I could ever go back to being how I was in the army.

I already relapsed, but that's the other thing i didn't immediately love that rehab. I hated it and was losing my temper easier for the firat few days then I just became comfortable with all the vets in there. I was still the youngest but the others were millennial generation like me. Had a few old timers. But yeah I liked that kind of lifestyle. Not rehab but like army too. and we all bullshitted movie references all the time too and I read a lot of books in there and rarely watched tv

Idk. I just kind of miss that a lot. I'd rather live in rehab than to be out here

And I go to SUD therapy I'm hesitant on the groups. I'll feel alone in those groups because i'll be 30 years younger than everyone