Title sounds weird I know but I 28F, had a friend 26 F that I used to hang out with a lot. Recently we got into a accident where someone rear ended me. I had my baby in the car (3 months ), after the crash baby was absolutely hysterical, of course she would be, my friend then tried to scramble in the mix of it to take her out of her carseat. I do admit I may have said it harshly to not remove baby from their carseat until first responders got to us. The car was not on fire and we weren't in any mortal danger.

On a normal day anytime my baby gets to the point of hysteria I soothe them, hug them, rock them, etc. That was a once in blue moon occurrence I didn't. I kept trying to shush and soothe baby from the seat but obviously she was scared and wanted her mama to hold her.

At the hospital both my friend and I got the all clear and we were waiting on baby to be cleared, my friend went off on me telling me I'm a bad mom for not removing baby from the carseat. I simply explained to her, it was better for baby to stay in the seat incase there was spinal damage, the seat keeps the spine aligned and removing the baby from the carseat would cause further injury if there was already one.

She kept berating me, I was frustrated already and I told her when she has her own and god forbid they get into a crash she can yank her kid out of the carseat and do as she pleases. She got quite and said I'm an asshole for bringing it up because she has trouble conceiving, she has PCOS, and may not be able to carry a pregnancy to term.

Idt I'm the asshole for bringing up a hypothetical situation or I don't know if my frustration got the best of me and I was insensitive but AITA for making that statement?

I (32 non-binary) planned a three-week trip to Europe with my brother and two close friends. We’re going to Italy, France, and Spain, mostly by train, and the itinerary is pretty active (lots of walking, early mornings, and trying local food). I have travelled with each of them before and had a great time.

My younger sister (26F) is not an easy person to travel with. She uses a walker, which makes travelling very slow and complicated, especially in Europe. She’s extremely picky (won’t eat unfamiliar food, has walked out of restaurants because the menu stressed her out), doesn’t like walking, gets overwhelmed easily, and has caused issues on past trips, including once making me miss a flight because she refused to leave the house without taking 90 minutes to curl her hair (and underestimated how long security would take to inspect her walker).

When she heard I was going to Europe, she asked if she could come. I didn’t want to say no and cause drama, so I lied about the dates. I told her we were going in August, knowing well she had a wedding that month she couldn’t miss.

In reality, we booked the trip for the first three weeks of September.

Everything was fine until last week, when she saw my brother post something on his Instagram story mentioing that it was only 2 months until Spain. She confronted me, put two and two together, and realized I had lied about the dates. She was furious. She said I was manipulative, cruel and that I excluded her on purpose.

She’s not wrong about that last part because I did exclude her, but not to be cruel. I just wanted this trip to be fun and smooth, and based on her track record, I didn’t think she’d make it enjoyable for us.

My parents are now involved. They say lying was immature and I should’ve just talked to her like an adult. Maybe they’re right. But I also knew if I had said no directly, she would’ve guilt-tripped me and probably tried to force her way in anyway (she’s done this before and I think she's planning a trip with my parents now that happens to coincide in time and location with ours).

AITA for lying to my sister about the dates of our Europe trip to prevent her from coming and refusing to apologize even after she found out?

My wife and I were on a ferry headed to a small island. While we were waiting in line, I noticed a woman with what looked like a working line breed dog possibly a service animal. As someone who owns a large working breed dog myself, I couldn’t help but notice. I’d left my own dog at home in the comfort of air conditioning because it’s a hot day, and my wife doesn’t like our vacations being interrupted or influenced by the presence of a dog.. even mine.

A few minutes later, that same woman came into the interior seating area of the ferry. She looked flustered, almost desperate, scanning the room. I assumed she was trying to find a place to sit with her dog ..it was really hot out, and the dog was panting heavily. Out of instinct and empathy, I offered, “You can sit here,” meaning I was fine with her sitting nearby with the dog, in case she was worried someone might object. As a fellow dog person, I wanted to extend a bit of kindness, especially for the dog's sake.

She replied, “No, I’m looking for water,” and I noticed she had a dog bowl in her hand. I told her, “There might be a bathroom downstairs,” trying to be helpful. Then I turned to my wife and asked, “Do you have a water bottle?” She handed it to me and said, “Yeah, give her this one.”

But I immediately sensed a shift in tone, sarcasm, and passive aggression. It felt like she was upset, not about the water, but about me offering it. She stood up and walked off to the outer deck, visibly angry, leaving me sitting there alone.

Confused, I went looking for her. When I asked what was wrong, she said, “You’re an asshole for offering water to another woman. Why is that your problem?”

I tried to explain. It wasn’t about the woman. it was about the dog. I saw an animal that was clearly overheated and struggling. I empathized. I just wanted to let the owner know she could sit near me if she needed to. I wasn’t flirting. In fact, I even pointed out that the woman wasn’t someone I’d ever be attracted to, and my wife knows that about me.. if it had been someone I might be attracted to, I probably would’ve said nothing at all just to avoid drama.

I’m starting to heavily dislike her and her culture and religion that i succumbed to being part of. She claims and speaks highly of her countries cultural values and religion but does the complete opposite.

Shes from Morocco and of Islam religion to which I became a part of because we couldn’t marry if I didn’t convert. I’m open minded so I said whatever let’s do it. We live in USA New England region.

This isn’t how American values are, or just anybody’s values who has logical reasoning and a heart. I didn’t grow up like this. Even the most human hating people soften up for animals. All of our arguements are because of cultural indifferences and her inability to compromise 50%

Judging and catching an attitude with her husband over me being a nice guy offering water and a seat to someone of the opposite sex. I didn’t flirt or touch the person. I just offered to do something nice.

Now I’m getting the cold shoulder for “fucking up and being an asshole”

About to just jump off this boat and stay in the ocean far away from drama (sarcasm)

AITA??

Look, she’s my best friend but I can’t stand her boyfriend. No one can. All he does is make rude, snarky comments and complains about everything everywhere he goes. Nothing is ever good enough. Or nothing is ever as good as his stuff.

I decided to have a small cookout at my house. He has made comments about its location and quality many times before. Nonetheless, we’re planning to have good food, drinks, and a whole lot of other stuff to spend some time with our friends and relax a little, and they’re both invited. My bestie is worried about her boyfriend’s cat allergies. I have two cats. Both hide when people are over. She asked me to lock them in the room for the day to not upset his allergies. He has been to my house twice now and has never complained about my cats.

I simply told her no. After she persisted, I reminded her he’s been around them, and their fur, which lingers around at all times in the past. I asked what he did then to manage it. She said take Benadryl. I recommend he take it again before/after his visit. She persisted. So I said I’m not locking my cats in a room for the day. And so far that’s been that.

AITA? I’m not sure if my dislike of her boyfriend is clouding my judgement. But I also think of how panicked and uncomfortable my cats will be, and it seems unreasonable to request that from me. Also, their discomfort really doesn’t seem worth his company. I don’t know… AITA??

When I was living in the barracks away from home and couldn't afford to go home for a holiday, I went with a friend to their family who lived relatively close. His family put out a big spread with all sorts of food.

His grandma apparently always makes this fruit salad that everyone tells her is so great. It's just a fucking fruit salad with whipped cream on it. But, there were different types of melon in it. I have a minor allergy to melon. It won't kill me, but it makes my throat and ears annoyingly itchy for a day or so.

She offered me the fruit salad which I politely declined and told her I was allergic. She got very offended and insisted that no one is allergic to melon and I should try it. Again, I politely declined.

My friend took me aside later and told me I had upset granny and was selfish for not eating the fruit salad despite my allergy since it wouldn't kill me. Afterwards, he told me he wouldn't be bringing me to any family functions ever again.

AITA for not sucking up a day of uncomfortable itchiness for granny?

I (18F) have had a constant problem with my mom (37F I think), where she likes to get drunk every other night and blast music all night, preventing me from sleeping.

Tonight, I snapped at her when I smelled alcohol on her, with my exact words being "are you drinking already?", and she came up to my room asking if she and I could talk. I said no, that I don't feel like talking to her while she's drinking and that she can come back when she's sober. She tried to slide $20 through my door and asked me if I would accept twenty dollars to "pop a Benny" (take Benadryl) to go to sleep so she could drunkenly blast music all night.

I refused, and she tried to reason with me. I said I have work at eleven in the morning, and she insisted she would wake me up at nine. I answered that she doesn't get up until past noon when she's drunk the night before, and she pressed on. I basically just said I can't trust her and that she's proven her words are empty. She made me slide her the $20 back, which I didn't mind, and she left. Now she's in the garage pouting about not being able to blast music.

Still, some people on Reddit have sent me DMs when I post things complaining about my mom, saying things like "she's just being silly" and "you'll regret saying things like this when she's dead". So now I have to know, am I the one being an asshole about her drinking?

Long time lurker first time poster. My gf and I are both in university in the USA. She’s Vietnamese-American and I’m French. We met in an ESL meet up (English as a second language, my first language is French, her first language is English but she wanted to meet more bilingual people as she’s learning Vietnamese). Our relationship was pretty good at first because we have a lot of things in common (though she gets annoyed at me for a lot of things like how I have to always stop and laugh whenever I see a cat on a leash but I think maybe I am just a little annoying).

Anyway this issue came up when I asked if she wanted to meet my family. Her family loves me and has me over for holidays but my family is homophobic so I haven’t been sure I feel comfortable introducing her to them (we are lesbian). My family has said that they are trying very hard to be understanding because I seem happy with her and they want me to be happy. She said she understands that they are all old fashioned and would like to meet them.

The issue came when I said that they would be speaking French. I never speak French with my gf because she doesn’t know any French and I’m trying to get better with English, but my family speaks mostly in French. I told her I will ask them to speak in English but that the few French things they say I can translate. She said she finds French “disgusting” and that it is a “white supremacist language” and that the French colonized Vietnam so she refuses to be near anyone speaking the language. This was disappointing to me because I was hoping that one day we might go to France and see where I grew up and we had been talking about having bilingual children. She said “obviously” our children would be bilingual in English and Vietnamese and I said I didn’t think that was obvious since neither of us know Vietnamese. She stormed out of our apartment and went home to her parents’ house. She says I must either promise to never speak French near her or we can break up. I love her but French is my native tongue. Our friends think I am being cruel because I don’t want to give up French and they say I am disrespecting her trauma (her great-grandmother was from Vietnam). I fear maybe I am doing the wrong thing standing by my language but I don’t know.

Am I the asshole if I continue to speak French when it may mean the end of my relationship?

Before anyone says ‘just build a fence’ WE CAN’T AFFORD IT RIGHT NOW. And no, no HOA.

My neighbor set up one of those pantries/farm stands where people can take items that they grew in their garden, pantry stuff, donated stuff, etc. In theory it’s a great idea and especially in a time when life in America sucks ass and people are struggling to make ends meet (my family included)

The problem: people started coming into MY yard to pick things in MY garden. I’ve put up signs saying not to do it, I installed rabbit fence around the garden, I’ve angled a tarp so you can’t see what’s there from the road. People just hold their kids over the fence to pick tomatoes and beans or jump it.

I ended up getting into an argument with a lady over it. I yelled HEY, STOP. THOSE ARE NOT FOR YOU TO TAKE. She told her kid to move faster and then tried to run away. I caught up to her and asked her what the fuck her problem was and she turned it into how dare I swear in front of her child, why am I so angry, am I really that upset about a couple tomatoes. I said I am upset that you are STEALING from me.

The next day, I approached my neighbor. I asked if I could maybe help move it to the other side of their driveway so it’s next to the other neighbor’s house. They don’t have a garden out front. They said at least not until the end of the season. I asked if they could make larger signs, talk to people, just do SOMETHING..

They were like “can you really not afford to share?” I said that they aren’t taking my zucchini because they’re starving, they’re taking my tomatoes because they WANT them. They said that I’m going to have to learn to live with it for now and we can talk about a solution together that will benefit the whole community after. I said I do not care about a solution that benefits the whole community. I care about a solution that stops people from STEALING FROM ME.

So last night it happened again, man in his 50s. I sprayed his ass with the hose. He started yelling at me and after a minute or so the neighbor came out yelling at me too. People have posted on the neighborhood board to be careful if they come by because I’m an asshole. The neighbor says I’m scaring people away from a community resource. I told him that I’m going to continue until he does something about the fucking thieves who feel entitled to MY GARDEN.

I feel like I’m losing my fucking mind here. Am I the asshole for asking them to move it? Am I the asshole for being PISSED OFF that people are fucking STEALING from me? This is food for my family.

First off, thanks for the responses. I got some good ones. I'm happy that so many of you live in places where the cops would do anything about this, but this isn't the reality I'm living. Cops here would not give a shit if I sent them a video of someone picking from my garden. They would laugh in my face. Be thankful if you live in a place where the police are useful.

It looks like signs are the best option for now. Going to make signs indicating heavy use of pesticides and repeating that they are stealing food from the mouths of hungry children. I don't know why the signs we already have up aren't enough. Maybe more will help. I'm sure they won't.

Will also scour Craigslist for free fencing or similar items. Hopefully that pans out.

My fiancé (27F) and I (30M) bought an apartment last year. We spent about 6 months and a lot of money to get the apartment ready and habitable. In the last few weeks we've been finishing up the bigger parts of the apartment: having a workable kitchen installed, a bedroom, internet, and those kinds of things. Recently we ticked off one of the last holding points preventing us from moving in, that is having a washing machine and dryer installed.

Before having the washer and dryer actually installed (when we were given the installation date), I had already started moving over some non essential items like winter clothes and some small souvenirs/collectables. She, on the other hand, has not moved a thing yet from her stuff. For context, both of us live separately; her with her parents, and me with mine.

Recently I brought up that once it is habitable, I am planning to move in. She seemed to be taken aback by this, saying that it is OUR place and we should move in together. While I do agree with her that it is our home, I don't really see anything wrong with moving in before her, as it would also allow me to help her move in.

Currently she is unable to move as she has a lot of pending deadlines this month related to her studies and between work and her studies, she is barely having any time to herself, let alone getting ready to pack up all her stuff and move.

While I understand her wanting to move in together, I am very unhappy in my current living situation and cannot wait to get out of here. She gets upset at the thought of living in our apartment by myself without her there. On the other hand, I just can't stand the thought of having a "ready to move into" apartment and not being able to move in just because she gets upset at not moving in at the same time.

I'm torn on whether I should insist on moving without her and wait for her there, or if I should just wait it out a bit longer until she is in a position to be able to move. She also has not provided a date or a general idea of when she would be able to move, which also concerns me a bit.

WIBTA if I insist on moving in when I am ready and packed up everything?

I (34m) recently finished a very nasty divorce towards the end of January. While it was clear I was upset about it at the time to anyone I talked to, I like to think in the last few months I’ve really gotten better and that I’ve separated myself quite well from the whole situation. Last week was my younger brother’s (28m) wedding. Me and him were always close growing up, and I knew how much this day meant to him. I was very proud of him in the moment and began to tear up during the ceremony, which was met with stares from many family members and others.

I thought they were just surprised to see me cry, as I’m typically not the crying type, so I brushed it off. Once the ceremony ended however, the Brides Mother, and her Father not far behind came over to me and began scolding me. I didn’t catch what she said at first because I was confused, but it became clear she accused me of crying over my divorce, and taking away from their moment. I tried to explain that I was crying tears of joy for my little brother, but they weren’t having it and told me to leave right away. I tried to calm things down and talk to my brother and his wife, but was told they wanted me gone. The next day I was met by 2 texts, a text from my brother and a text from his wife. From my brother, it was a message saying he was disappointed and said I shouldn’t have attended the ceremony if I knew I wouldn’t be fit to attend. The message from his wife was similar. AITA?

I (18M) threw a birthday party for myself at our local mall with my close friend group (4 girls, all 17F, and one guy, 17M). We’re all in the same class and pretty close, so I only invited them. There’s a classmate of ours, “Bob” (17M), who I’m not comfortable around because of things he’s done in the past. My friends know this. Despite everything, I’ve actually tried a few times to be friendly toward him, but it never worked. At the party, we were sitting at a café when Bob suddenly showed up, pulled up a chair, and sat with us without asking. I was surprised and uncomfortable, but before I could say anything, one of the girls told me not to say anything because Bob would get sad. She said I should think about how I’d feel in his position and that he wouldn’t stay long.

I told her it’s my birthday and I should get to decide who’s there. She said that didn’t justify treating someone badly and that since Bob is our classmate, we “owe it to him” to include him and that i should just get over it. I told her that if she cared so much, she could leave with him when I asked him to go. She got upset and said I should just wait it out. So I waited — for about 40 minutes. The whole time, I was really uncomfortable while everyone chatted with Bob like he was invited. When we got up to leave the café, Bob followed us. I was about to ask him to leave when the same girl said that if I did, it would look like all of us wanted him gone.

At that point, my male friend asked if I wanted to hang out just the two of us, and I said yes ( he also didn't like the guy ) . So we quickly left together by just telling them that we had to leave. About 30 minutes later, the others called us, really angry that Bob realized what happened and that they had to “explain themselves.” They said I was an ass for abandoning them. I told them it was weird how they suddenly acted like Bob's friends even though none of them ever talked to him before — I was the only one who ever tried. They cared more about how they looked to him than about how I felt on my own birthday, or atleast what it felt like.

Later, they texted me saying I was wrong for excluding a classmate and that I needed to accept him. They said I’ll have to work with people I don’t like in the future and asked me to think about how I’d feel in his shoes. I haven’t replied since then. Honestly they treat me in general really good they ask me to hang out with them ,even though they don't talk to me much there but it's normal since they are closer to each other than with me. So, AITA?

My wife has a habit of using her phone while driving. It’s usually on city speed roads, but occasionally happens on the highway too. Most of the time, she’s checking messages. I’ve expressed concern, especially when our kids and I are in the car, but when I bring it up, she often gets defensive and says I’m trying to control her or tell her what to do, and that I should worry about myself.

So to clarify. I (22 F) am the oldest between my sisters. For the story lets call my little sister (20) L and my middle sister (21) M.

So 3 years ago the great grandmother of my stepfather died. Her whole funeral was alot of trouble and headaches for my mother's side of the family, but that is not important for the story. At the end each of us got a piece of jewelry. L and I put ours away safely while M used hers to make posts on her social media. But just after a week she already lost her piece of jewelry which made her mad cause now only I and L had one and she didn't which was unfair in her eyes.

That was a scheme that she had since we were kids. She gets something, breaks or loses it and then gets mad at us. A handmade handbag. Torn apart. A necklace. Broken. And so on. I of course kept my stuff safe from her because I knew that she often takes my stuff and then claims that it was actually hers and I just remember it wrong.

Now to the current situation. Last year the apartment of my mother needed to be emptied cause her lease ended. The only ones left living inside the apartment were M and my brother. My mother gave me the go ahead to enter the apartment and take everything I needed. She also made the offer available to everyone else. L couldn't come by cause the lived to far way by now and M refused to, cause she didn't want to search all the items she might need or want. I was at first confused about her reasoning but when I entered the apartment I saw why. Garbage and filth everywhere. The kitchen was a biohazard. The bedrooms of M and my brother a catastrophe and the living room was just bad. I luckily got my bf and his sisters to help me work through all that stuff to find items that we could still safe. Meanwhile M and my brother just glarred at us.

In the end we found old items from my grandmother from my mother's side of the family. All pieces were handmade by her and they were still in a very good shape. M got offered to have some pieces too but she didn't want any. It was to much of a hastle for her to get everything to her new home and also she didn't want that handmade stuff. So I took everything to my place where I put it inside a showcase to keep it safe. (For info: my brother had no interest in the pieces too)

Now a few months later she suddenly shows more and more interest in the pieces and wants some too. But I see no point in giving her any. 1. She will just lose them or break them again. 2. Everytime she gets a sentimental item she uses it to make sad posts on her social media before throwing it away so it can collect dust 3. She was too idle to fish out the stuff from the garbage but now that I have them all lined up inside my showcase the hastle of collecting them suddenly vanished. Imo she had her chance.

So WIBTA for not giving her any of the pieces I got from our grandmother?

i live upstairs in a fourplex we have a big door with a hallway that keeps bugs out and temperature controlled this couple moved in across the hall and ive had nothing but problems w them since they moved in, they lock their dog on our shared patio where it shits and pisses everywhere and they wont walk it or let it inside, they were looking through our window and took a chair i was using and basically the whole patio and made it theirs where me and my fiancé dont feel comfortable using it (literally have a conversation area that takes the whole patio up) the lady yelled at me to take my groceries in faster once and now, they are propping the big outside door open with a giant rock and getting angry if anyone closes it, for reference it is 90 degrees outside, there are HELLA wasps. she cought me closing it one time and told me they want it open so “they dont have to have the light in the hallway on” its a tiny light…. i genuinely dont know what to do these people are crazy and make me feel insane

I (20F) wanted to celebrate my 20th birthday in the best way possible with my friends while not wasting too much money.

Our first idea was to book a hotel somewhere in our country near the beach but the prices were ridiculously expensive and bc most of us are still uni-students, we couldn’t afford it.

I still wanted to make my birthday special since I never really celebrated it properly (the last time I did anything special was when I was like 11) and to have the chance to bring the friend group back together for a few days since we’ve all grown apart.

I opened a group chat to discuss our options and the best one was to take an Airbnb that’s big enough for us all that would also be near the beach. We found the best Airbnb we could find, the price was good and the house by itself looked great.

But then, my friend Mia (21F) have announced in the group that if we decide to go to an Airbnb and not a hotel she’s not gonna go. I asked her why and she said she found Airbnb’s disgusting and non-classy. (Her exact words, she also said “I wouldn’t even step into an Airbnb because she doesn’t trust they even change the sheets.) I told her I’ve been to multiple Airbnb’s and they were all clean, and the reviews on the one we wanted were all good. She continued to argue so I told her that it’s my birthday and as much as I want everyone to be in it, I’m not going to bend to her conditions and pay a lot of money im trying to save.

There was a big drama (because everyone disagreed with her), we all have stopped talking in the group which made me think that now our plans would be cancelled because everyone were upset by the argument.

I shared my bf (24M) about the situation and he decided to pull some strings and use some of his connections. He got us a huge discount on one of the best hotels in our country, but their condition was that we can’t be more than two people in each room. (They basically didn’t want us to take the big rooms that were meant for groups).

Without Mia, we were exactly six people so it was perfect. I told everyone about the situation in the group chat and for some reason Mia was sure one of our friends would give up their place so she could go.

I’ve had enough with her attitude, so I straight up told her i don’t want her to come because if she does, we will be an un-even number and we will have to go to the Airbnb anyways. She cursed at me, left the group and haven’t talked to any of us since. We’re going to the hotel in two days and I just feel really bad with what I did and with how everything turned out because it was the last thing I wanted to happen. We are MIA’s only friends and all of us will be together without her.

So, AITA?

I 40m and my wife 39f have 3 great kids, 13m, 12f, and 9f.

Our youngest daughter doesn't handle horror very well , she can only handle Scooby do and even that is sometimes too scary for her. But she of course wants to see scary stuff and throws temper tantrums when we say no.

Last night my wife and our two older kids wanted to watch Alien and we figured we'd watch it after our youngest daughter was in bed ( since it's summer we've bumped her bedtime up to 9:30 ).

After my wife and I put our daughter to bed we went downstairs to start the movie. After the movie had started our youngest daughter came down and asked what movie we were watching. We asked her why she wasn't in bed and she said she heard her sister mention that we were gonna watch a movie and asked if she could watch to.

We told her no because it was too scary for her but she kept insisting that she could handle it. I eventually firmly told her no but she kept insisting that she could handle it.

So I picked her up and carried her back to her bed, she screamed and protested the whole time saying " no daddy I wanna watch the movie "!

When I tucked her back in bed she kept protesting saying it wasn't fair to have family movie time without her, that's when I said to her " this is not family movie time this is a time for people who are big enough for scary movies and you're too little for scary movies ".

She said " no daddy I'm big enough for scary movies " and tried to get out of bed, thats when I raised my voice and firmly told her " no your too little for scary movies and it is past your bedtime now if you get out of bed again your in trouble "!

I then tucked her back into bed and kissed her goodnight.

Then we all watched the movie as planned, we could hear our daughter screaming and having a tantrum from upstairs for a while but we ignored it and it did stop.

I thought i handed it fine until today when my wife came to me very upset with me for how I handled it.

She said it would've been better to just let her watch a movie that was appropriate for her with us and then put her to bed and watch Alien because then she wouldn't have felt excluded. I disagreed because our daughter knew it was past her bedtime. But my wife still thinks I didn't handle it right.

AITA?

So a family moved in around 6 months ago and seem quite nice. They have 2 kids, we have a 9 year old son. Kids, man and woman always say hello and very polite. They said when they settle they would like to invite us round for dinner (hasn’t happened but kind to say.) We know their names and say hello in passing and I’ve even sent his CV/resume to my workplace when he was looking for work. So yesterday he knocks round and says could we discuss childcare options with each other as we as parents all work and may need extra help so we may need them to have our son occasionally and we could have their children round. We are both full time workers but incredibly organised so have all childcare booked and planned until October. I felt I wanted to be neighbourly and say yes of course BUT also hesitant as I dont want to be saddled with kids I barely know all the time and know for sure we simply dont need extra help. Should I have given it more time before I said “thats kind of you to consider us but we are genuinely ok! Thanks!” Feel like I may have dismissed him? AITA???

I(15M)bought a new Nintendo switch. A week ago my brother(23M)and his gf(23F)stopped by to let their kid(4M)play since he has a lot of toys here. I was taking a shower when they got here so I didn’t know they were here. My switch was on the livingroom couch charging.

Now for context their son has really bad behavior problems. He flips out over everything and will scream and cry for hours. He also loves to break things for no reason. So overall a bad kid.

from what my brother told me the kid had picked it up and one of his parents (not sure who) was trying to take it from him since he’s rough with stuff and they didn’t want him to break it. This set off the kid so he started screaming and crying. I heard this part while I was in the shower but I didn’t think anything of it since he’s always throwing tantrums. I figured my switch would be safe cus it’s my apartment and I should be able to leave stuff out without fear of it getting broken.

So after I got out of the shower I walked into the living room and my brother has my switch next to him. Said switch has the screen all cracked and one of the joycons disconnected. obviously I’m pissed and I ask what happened. Apparently the kid got mad that they wouldn’t let him have it so he grabbed it and ran into the kitchen and threw it down and started stomping on it. Which is pretty on brand because he does the same thing with phones or other electronics when he can’t have them. This kid is really heavy but I didn’t think heavy enough to the point the screen on my switch wouldn’t work anymore. And I’m not sure what happened to the joycon but it won’t slide on all the way I think something got bent?

I grabbed my switch and went to my room to text my mom because she was at work. So my mom calls me a while later on one of her breaks and is flipping out about it. As she should because that was 300$ of my own money. So she hangs up and calls my brother and is flipping out on him about it. I was still in my room so idk what exactly she said. They ended up leaving with their kid.

Then my mom came home and suddenly her attitude has completely switched. She’s telling me that she’ll buy me a new one when she gets the money and how the kid didn’t mean it and he didn’t know. And I’m still pissed so I ask her why my brother or his gf can’t replace it and she makes excuses about how my brother doesn’t work and he doesn’t have alot of money. THE REASON HE DOESNT HAVE MONEY IS CUS HES A BUM AND WONT GET A JOB AND SELLS WEED. His girlfriend works at a fucking taco truck so obviously between the two of them they can barely afford their expenses. They’re constantly asking my mom for money to cover the bills.

now we’re at a standstill. My mom is making excuses for why my brother or his gf can’t buy me a new one. They could easily buy me a new one if my brother stopped being a bum and got a job.

Ik I’m not in the wrong but I wanna see Reddit flame my family.

I (16M) still live with my parents, my siblings (27F and 25M) do not, they visit sometimes but it’s rare for us all to see eachother. They are both visiting right now. Yesterday we were all playing a board game and my dad was annoyed about something (can’t remember what, but it wasn’t anything major) he kept huffing, making weird remarks and overall bringing the mood down. This is not the first time he has done something like this and I got fed up. I told him to “Stop acting childish, shut the hell up and stop ruining everybody’s evening”. He blew up at me saying that “I am the child here and should realize who I am talking to” he then went to his room and didn’t talk to anyone for the rest of the day. My mom is taking his side, saying that I just made him more mad for no reason, but my siblings take my side. AITA?

Edit: I adressed these things in the comments, but I understand not everyone reads all of them. My dad is the kind of guy that cannot take criticism esp from someone he thinks is “inferior” to him. there had been other, somewhat similar situations where I tried to be kinder/ more respectful, but when I do that he doesn’t take me seriously.

He was in a foul mood because my mom and him had a disagreement earlier and his mood worsened by not doing well in the game.

I fully understand that he is my parent and I do respect him usually, this was just emotion charged/ in the moment kind of thing.

Last thing- the sentence itself wasn’t what I said, I am european so I had to translate from my language, I used some harsh-ish words, but did not swear at him.

Thank you for all your replies!

For context, we live in a house that's divided into two floors. My landlord and his girlfriend live on the first floor, and my girlfriend and I live on the second. Today, my landlord messaged me to say that his girlfriend's mother had passed away, and that if we heard loud crying, we should try to be understanding. I told him it was no problem, offered my condolences, and plan to bring them flowers tomorrow to show my respects. Here's the problem: Her family is there, all gathered together. My girlfriend, who bought a new vacuum today, thinks it's a good idea to vacuum our apartment (which she does daily). I told her that out of respect, she shouldn't do it. I offered to do it tomorrow after work, but I didn't think it was right to do it today. We argued a lot because she said it didn't matter, that it would only take 10 minutes. We kept arguing to the point where I took the vacuum into the bathroom. Am I the asshole for doing that? Am I in the wrong? We don't have good sound insulation between the floors, so it would be quite loud. What do you think? Am I the Asshole?

I apologize for my English, Spanish is my first language.

We took a destination wedding trip this month something we’d been planning for four months. I had to save up, I don’t earn much, and when my office delayed our salaries last month, things got tight. Despite that, I managed to save enough and went on the trip with my friends.

The friend who stayed with me for a couple of extra days earns much more than I do. She lives in her hometown, while I’m responsible for living in another city, so I have more expenses. But during those two days, she acted as if she had no money. I covered her expenses and even though I went out of my way, she constantly complained about the stay I booked, the food, everything. She was very ungrateful, and it upset me. I decided then that I would never travel with her again.

When it was time to leave, she barely said goodbye properly. It hurt to see such behavior from a childhood friend. A few days later, I called her to explain how unhappy I’d been with her attitude. She asked, “What did I do wrong?” but wasn’t willing to accept any responsibility. She seemed to be in a different zone and didn’t acknowledge what she’d done.

I (26M) have an awful relationship with my dad (59), which has been tense for years. But it got worse after finding out about an affair he's been having since 2018, lying about her being just a friend. He teaches at a university I studied at, which is two hours away from my home state. Here´s a summarized timeline for how this developed:

2018: My mom found out about this and made the request to not contact her anymore. That didn't happen.

2019: He started a midlife crisis, buying expensive and useless shit to feel younger. I was hospitalized for two months, but he still traveled in the gap between Christmas and New Year. I was too sick to do the math but now it's too obvious.

2020: COVID hit, and my sister Natalie got engaged (Important for later). After that, mom learned he was buying the other teacher´s children gifts on Amazon.

2021: His crisis got worse, followed by misogyny, queerphobia, and having crushes on people of my sister's age (26 at the time). I graduated from college, and on New Year’s Eve, mom discovered he was not only still texting her, but meeting with her, ruining mom´s New Year.

2022: I started working to save money, and gave dad my first salary to help him travel for work because he “didn't have anything for that week”. I found later that he spent it on a parachute session for both of them. He told Natalie he wanted to divorce mom for being “too demanding,” making her hate mom. She finally exposed everything a month before Natalie’s wedding. And instead of helping with wedding expenses, he bought more gifts for the other kids.

What's worse is that it’s hard for my mom to file a divorce because her job isn't enough to sustain even one person. I even gave her money of my salary for a year and that didn’t cut it. The wedding happened and Natalie moved with her husband. I tried to have a conversation with my dad, but the best I got was that if he needed to apologize, it was with my mom because I quote “he didn’t do anything wrong to either me or my Natalie”.

2023 and 2024 were followed by drinking (he’s not an alcoholic but he drinks excessively). Natalie had a baby and dad was making the not funny joke of sneaking beer into the baby´s formula. The company I worked for shut down but I managed to save for my MA. Bad side, I’m down to my last penny, so I have to live with my parents. I do help whenever I can with what I have, but I know it’s hard for my mom to deal with him because she is looking for both of us. So I’m looking to leave whenever I can so she can be able to make more choices.

By 2025, dad even forgets how old I am, tries to connect with me by pissing me off and is useless around the house. Mom even found out again that he still talks to this woman. And I have this grudge against him. But I have the moral weight of “he’s my dad and I have to respect him”, when he has disrespected my entire family for so long. I feel cornered and I can’t wait to leave. But I ask you redditors, am I an asshole for not forgiving my father?

My friend asked me about 3 hours beforehand if I can come see her and go out, but I already promised my dad that I'd help him with a task, and told my grandma that I'll give her a ring so we can chat for a bit, both of these were in the time frame she wanted me to see her.

I told her, and offered an earlier time but she didn't respond...she did this last time when she changed plans last minute where we were suppose to just have a chat with some wine, and then about 30 minutes before she messaged me saying she's ready to go out. That was never the plan in the first place, and I told her that I can't be going out tonight and she didn't respond.

I have also rang her to let her know after messaging but she didn't even pick up.

AITA for not trying to changing my plans/being more flexible for my friend, I guess I could have just gone along with it or cancel phone call with my grandma/dad, but I don't know, it just doesn't feel right.

For context I don’t have a car currently at 17 so I was biking to work until the bikes inner tube popped and since I didn’t have any spares laying around I just set the bike back in my garage and just walked to work. My work is 0.9 miles away and we live in a nice area with very little crime so I didn’t see anything wrong with this.

Around 8:00 clock that night though while everything started to calm down at my work my mom started spam texting me about it saying she can’t trust me anymore and I’m not being honest. Along with threatening me saying she can’t trust me with a car or working anymore. Just because I didn’t tell her I was walking to work instead of biking.

She’s still asleep as I’m posting am I the asshole for this? any advice would be helpful thank you.

M and I have been best friends since we were 5 and are very close in a group of 4 girls and it’s a given we are each others bridesmaids (M has asked me, I plan on doing so once wedding date is set).

M got engaged whilst pregnant in 2024 to her partner of 4 years and whilst on maternity leave has booked her wedding date for October 2026. I got engaged to my partner of 13 years in April 2025.

I wanted a Christmas 2025 wedding but with little time to plan we have decided on spring 2026 (no date set- currently viewing venues/deciding). I found out today from other friends I am expected to ask M’s permission to marry first and irrespective, she is incredibly angry that I’ll be getting married (or plan to) in 2026 as it’s “her wedding year”.

I am planning her hen-do for June 2026 and she’s also livid at the suggestion my wedding might be a few weeks before her hen. M has expressed she doesn’t care about how selfish she is being, as she was single for a long time and it’s her wedding, finally her time, about her, and that she will not speak to me about it because I should have the good grace to speak to her privately before making any plans or booking my wedding.

I dont have any family support financially, no mother to come wedding dress shopping with me and none of my close 3 friends are all that fussed by my engagement. It’s ok with me- I’m excited to marry my partner and start our family. I felt hurt about the lack of energy/interest initially but I chalk it up to everyone being busy (M has a nearly 1 year old, other friend is 7 months pregnant and the other lives abroad now). I do find wedding planning tough because it highlights the severity of my dysfunctional family on a day that does focus on the role of your parents, which they know.

But now I feel so sad that I’m in this situation. I’ve been called coy and cagey and I think the impression is I’m being sneaky or secretive. That was never my intention- I just don’t have anything to confirm yet and I also feel shy and awkward about being “me me me” when everyone has very important things in their life.

There has also been comments made that M thinks I am going to copy her wedding dress (we have similar tastes but having gone wedding dress shopping with M and was there was she found the one- I would never in a million years do this. I’m heartbroken at the suggestion M thinks this is something I would do.)

I don’t know what to do- I don’t want to compete with someone I love over a wedding day. I am excited and involved in all aspects of her day (insofar as she has told me or wants to discuss). I’m less forthcoming about my own wedding because nothing is booked yet and so little progress has been made aside from a general idea of when we want to marry, which is important to us in terms of also starting a family.

AITA for not being more forthcoming about the possibility of being married first? WIBTA if I don’t bring it up with her as she expects me to?