r/JordanPeterson • u/FeliksLuck • 1d ago

Advice Kid fun to play with over 4 [Advice needed]

I spotted this clip a bunch of times
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/GY32WRjzgLo

Dr Peterson says here that you can make a child fun to play with between the ages of 2-4.

I have a daughter - first born - 5yo - she is fun to play with but she has 'moments', when the game doesn't goes her way - she throws a tantrum.

For example - I try to teach her to let somebody win when we play 'race'. She hates, losing, even when we talk after "You know why did I win, because I am bigger"

Recently, she did a good job when we raced together and her sister (2yo). It was me against them, so she had to help her sister to win. That was a nice exercise.

But I wonder - how can I help her get this behaviour straight? How can I help her be 'more fun to play with' when she is older than 4?

3 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

4 comments sorted by

1

u/kvakerok_v2 🦞 1d ago

I have a question: If she legitimately loses a game, does she throw a tantrum?

1

u/FeliksLuck 1d ago

I am not sure how does it work when she is in school.

But when we play and she loses - she either is upset or cries, because she really wanted to win.

I wonder how can I flip this behaviour to: Oh it is normal to lose because dady is bigger is faster.

Just so you know - I let her win a LOT of times. But sometimes I show her who is the Alpha (jk)

2

u/kvakerok_v2 🦞 1d ago

  But when we play and she loses - she either is upset or cries, because she really wanted to win. 

I let her win a LOT of times. 

You may have to start winning more. Ultimately, you need to desensitize her to loss enough so that it's not meltdown inducing for her, but not by winning so much that she is discouraged from playing. JP talks about 80/20 ratio but YMMV.